I have become convinced recently that one of the aspects that impedes grief management and healing is the mistaken idea that healing means forgetting. And we don't want to forget our beloved pets. But nothing could be further from the truth! The rough and winding road to healing is not a straight line from point A to point B, as much as we might like for it to be. But neither is it an endless road. The truth is that we need to follow that road with our pet. No, I'm not talking about some supernatural exercise. I simply mean that we need to keep the living memory of our beloved pet and companion with us. Regradless of your belief about the hereafter, nearly everyone believes in the power of living memories. [Personally, I believe we will be reunited with our beloved companions after our own physical deaths, but I don't force that belief on anyone.] Suzanne Clothier wrote a wonderful book, Bones Would Rain From the Sky: Deepening Our Relationships With Dogs. She says, "Each relationship with an animal and a human is a bridge uniquely shaped to carry only those two, and so must be crafted by them." The same is true of the bridge (or road) from Grief to Healing.  Friends and loved ones can offer sympathy, love, and advice, and those offerings are welcome and helpful beyond measure. And they certainly help ease the pain along the way. But in the final analysis, we are alone with the living and loving memories of our beloved companions on that road to healing. There are many, many small steps on that road, and a few really big ones. One of the biggest is the realization that healing does not mean forgetting. Healing means we have moved through the door (even though it stays open). Healing means that the scar has turned from red to pink (it will always be there). And healing means that we look at pictures and old toys, and every other reminder of the companions of our lives and hearts, with a smile, maybe a laugh, maybe an occasional tear...but always with joy in the memory. I love you, Winker. You were with me on the other journey; now you're with me on this one. I thank you for both, my forever besses puppo.