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Neutering does not change their personality. It may make him a little less intense and territorial, but that is a GOOD thing, and in this case I would definitely recommend it.
I don't understand why you would think neutering would make him less desirable to a new home. The vast majority of people want a neutered dog, and it would probably make him LESS desirable to a good home if he is intact because the new owner would have to pay for the neuter. It would also be incredibly irresponsible to rehome him fully intact, knowing his temperament is not reliable and knowing he could be possibly used as a stud and pass that on to his puppies.
Rachael, you are well intended, but seem to have some wrong assumptions which may be contributing to, or have caused, what is going on. You say the dog is almost two and you also say you have toddlers. Many people have this vision of "Old Yeller" the Yellow Lab in the movies, and equate a good family dog with one who will take anything the kids will dish out, but this is Hollywood, not real life! The interaction between dogs and children, especially children younger than school age, needs to be ALWAYS supervised. By supervised I mean you are in the SAME ROOM as the kids and the dog. Young children are never too young to be taught proper interaction with any dog. A small child sees no difference between a live dog and his stuffed animal. One has to teach being gentle, never grabbing, never chasing, not disturbing the dog when he's sleeping or eating, not hitting the dog ( a toddler may think this is quite funny). The dog needs to have a safe place where the children know they should not go to bother him, be it his crate or under the table, or his bed. The dog also needs to learn how to be gentle with the children. You should by all means neuter him, it will not make him unhappy, nor change his personality for the worse, it will make him a better pet, whether you keep him or need to re-home him. It will also not solve your immediate problems, but contribute to the long term solution.
If you did not care, you would not be asking these questions. You need a good private trainer with experience with dog-child interaction, that can guide YOU in the proper treatment of the situation and you need to keep limiting access to the children until you are properly guided. There are thousands of perfectly good dogs that get put to sleep because there are no homes available. A 2yr old un-neutered male with a history of biting has little chance of finding a good home. If you've had the dog from puppyhood and he did not display bad temperament to begin with, he could pay with his life for your well intended mishandling of him. A trainer can also help you evaluate if the scenario I painted applies to your case, or if the dog has indeed a temperament problem. Some dogs never do like children. If they are neutered and well behaved, they can still find a home, though choices are more limited.
Avoid dominance techniques that can really get you in trouble and make the dog more likely to bite. My guess is that, with proper advice and management, you are still not too late to turn this around, but time is of the essence. I hope, if this happens, you update your post in six months or so. Good luck.
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