My mom died this morning--July 4, 2012, at 3 a.m. Her suffering is over. This has been a sad year, so far. We lost Stinky Wink in February, then my dad in May, and now Mom. There is definitely a cycle to life, birth to death, and all the things in between that make life what it is. The cycle includes people: parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends, spouses and children. It also includes pets that we love, who love us in return, for no other reason than the fact that we belong to each other, and belonging means love.
But in that cycle of our own birth-to-death, there are other deaths that touch our lives--deaths of people and pets that we love. And each of those deaths diminishes our lives somewhat. One life cannot be part of another without creating a void when it is no longer there. The three losses I have had this year have shaken me. I am an orphan. For the first time in my life, there is no generation older than me in my direct family. That is a sobering thought. To my grandchildren, I am the generation that my grandparents were to me. I even grew up with great-grandparents, until well after I was married.
Even though there is sadness in the cycle of life, there is also, in spite of it, great joy that comes flooding over us in the most unexpected ways and at the most opportune times. When I got my boys up this morning, even after the news of my mother's death, they brought me joy. They wiggled, jumped, licked, and made noises (very much like talking), as they always do--unaware of what had happened while they slept. Unaware of the sadness that filled my heart at the moment--yet putting the salve of their love on that pain and reminding me that life continues, the cycle goes on. And they love me because we belong to each other.
Rest in peace, Stinky Wink, my besses puppo. Rest in peace Dad, Rest in peace, Mom.
Rosalin Joan Martin DeJaynes
24 May 1933---4 July 2012