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Comment by DR, Nala & Simon on May 9, 2010 at 3:13pm

Healing kisses from Nala & Cosmo.

Comment by Rebecca Marie O'Bryan on May 9, 2010 at 1:37pm

o wow, i am so sorry for your loss!!! i know what you are going through, i had just lost snoopy on thurs and me and my husband cant stop crying...maybe your husband just dosnt understand that are pets are like are children (furry children) i think maybe he is just jealous and dosnt feel what u feel and is frustrated. this is a tough time but i know u will pull through i am sorry that your husband is being like that:( u are in my thoughts and prayers!. lots of hugs sent your way!

Comment by Beth on May 9, 2010 at 11:53am

I cried for days when I lost my cat, Alice at the end of January. I e-mailed my family, friends, and co-workers to tell them the news because I could not bear to talk about it. Just a couple weeks ago I was talking to someone at work who didn't realize I'd lost her. I started telling the story and I was tearing up again. I love my new kitty cat but I still miss Alice terribly.

Everyone grieves in her own way. I am sorry your husband is giving you a hard time. Men like to "fix" things and sometimes when they can't fix it, they get frustrated and lash out a little. When we were first married, my husband would be horrible and cranky when I was sick. Instead of assuming he didn't care, I asked him why and he answered that he didn't know what I expected of him. I told him that I wanted him to a) mostly leave me alone and b) keep the house kinda quiet, and c) check in on me once an hour or so to see if I needed anything. He responded, with relief, that he could handle that! Since then, he's positively the most wonderful person I could have around when I'm ill. So perhaps if you just explain to him that you are grieving in your own way, and you don't need him to make you feel better, you just need him to sort of be there and accept your behavior and maybe give you a hug, it might help?

It's a two-way thing, though, so maybe it's also time to sit down and review where you are at. Sometimes it helps to give ourselves a certain condition: "I'll allow myself to cry over Kazi at xx and xx times, and other times I will keep myself busy with things that focus my attention elsewhere. With Alice, I allowed myself to cry over her at bedtime and in the morning after those first few days. I have struggled with depression in the past, so for me personally it's very important that I not allow sad events to overwhelm my life.

Big hugs on missing your furbaby. Grief never goes away, but it does get softer.

Comment by Ashley and Copper on May 9, 2010 at 10:44am

Some people will never understand. It will be one year and three months on the 10th that I have lost Pooh and I still cry every now and again. It was really terrible when I first lost him. I mean I lost weight, I was depressed and I was angry because of the way I lost him. In the end, I laugh at people who think they are JUST dogs... They don't know what it's like to feel that unconditional love and the fact that we do, makes us special. You may never be able to get him to understand and that's ok. It will frustrate the hell out of you but in the end you are the one who loved and had the love of an amazing animal and no one can take that away from you. Believe me, I was single the whole time I had Pooh and went through some of the hardest times of my life with him, and I also depended on him for happiness.It's amazing all the little things you miss when they are gone like the jingle of a collar or the clicking of their nails, etc. You'll make it through it but you'll never forget them.

Comment by Jennifer Markley on May 9, 2010 at 10:21am

Show him this...

Comment by Joanna, Rainy and Calvin on May 9, 2010 at 10:19am

I am very sorry to hear about Kazi. I lost Algy in March and I still cry because I miss him so much. They are not just animals. They are there or you everyday and they love and look up to you so much. They are happy because they are with you, and that means everything, or should. There was one person in my extended family that couldn't understand why we were all crying, and she said, 'well, he was just a dog." She was lucky she was several states away because I would have punched her. So you're not alone. You need to cry. But try to remember the good times too, and how happy Kazi was with you and your family. It will get easier, although you will never forget him.

Comment by christy fry on May 9, 2010 at 9:55am

I didn't get out of bed for 2 days after Shuffs passed and almost 2 yrs later sometimes I'll just glance at his picture and I'll start crying all over again. I don't think the missing them part ever really goes away.....hugs..

Comment by Bev Levy on May 9, 2010 at 8:55am

Some people (often men) mask grief by making fun of it. Not nice but they don't feel comfortable when other's express theirs. That may be what your hubby is doing. Do you have someone else that can handle talking about Kazi? That will help. We also have two groups on this site that are devoted to remembrance. I know what you feel and it takes time and focusing on what you have but most of us benefit from sharing. Hope I see you in Corgis Remembered or/and Rainbow Bridge Corgis. I could not be more sorry for your loss.

Comment by Jane Christensen on May 9, 2010 at 8:17am

Unconditional love...that's what we get from our animals and this is hard when they leave us! Your husband probably can't understand the bond between you and Kazi! I am so sorry for your loss...you need to grieve that is part of the process! Things will get better but we all have a different amount of time to this! I understand how dogs become our closest friends as mine are many times too! They're there to listen!

Comment by Mark on May 9, 2010 at 7:14am

I agree. Sometimes people forget that our dogs are not just animals, they're companions. They are there to play with us when we're happy and they comfort us in their own way when we're sad. Our dogs can even show to be more loyal and compassionate that some people now-a-days in this messed up world. We don't just give them food and a toy or two, we give them love; we give them ourselves. And when they die, it leaves a gaping hole in our hearts. That hole is there because we're missing something. We miss the way they would greet us when we came home. We miss how they would lick our face to make us laugh, or how they would look at you when they wanted you to play with them. But most of all--we miss that our friend, the little guy who was always there, even when no one else was, is gone. An animal is just that, an animal--replaceable. A companion can never be truly replaced. Sure we may, in time, get a new dog and give him love just the same. But that new dog will never replace our old friend. I love my two dogs with all of my heart. They're the first two dogs that I've raised and cared for myself. They've been my closest friends for the past 2 years--getting me through the loneliness that comes with living alone in a town away from all your friends. If I lost either one of them I would be absolutely devastated, so I can relate to what you're going through. I can tell you that the pain you're feeling will go away in time, but it is important not to rush through your grief simply because someone else just doesn't understand. Things will get better.

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