Dad Wants a Dog...
This is not Corgi related but I was hoping to get some input anyhow since it is about dogs.
My Dad has always had dogs. His favorite was an Australian Shepherd who he adored and took everywhere until she died of cancer when she was 6 or 7 years old. His other dog, who was very old, passed away a few months ago while he was in the hospital and I was going to his house to care for her. Now he is without a pet and looking to get a Queensland Heeler. The issue is this; he now lives alone and is currently going through chemotherapy. He's very week and barely able to take care of himself. He is also a bit of a hoarder so his home is cluttered with "stuff" making it a miserable place to live but he refuses to part with most of the things. It’s not a good living situation for him as it is.
He’s been talking about wanting to get a dog because he’s alone at his house and needs the companionship. He’s been excited about it since he started talking about it a few weeks ago which is a nice change of pace because he’s been feeling very down and defeated. I think he’s right from that aspect; a dog would be good company and lift his spirits. Dogs are great and they do help people get through bad things. The part I worry about is how well will the dog be cared for? If he gets a puppy he has to go through all the training, shots, neutering etc. It’s far too much work for him and the puppy would pay the price. He agreed he would take a one or two year old (still worried about how it would be cared for but not as much as a puppy) but he hasn’t found any adults available so he’s looking at puppies.
He’s meeting up with a breeder today who is bringing him an 8 week old female to look at. This is an awful idea. He knows it is but he’s eager to have a dog and he’s being stubborn and a bit selfish. He asked me about how often Finn has to go out when he was little so I told him about all the work of raising Finn and he said “I don’t suppose there’s anyone I could leave it with for a while” hinting that he wants me to raise it and that’s not possible.
I don’t know what to do. I want what will help my Dad but I don’t want an animal to be put in an unfit home. If he goes into the hospital again or rehab, I can’t take his dog and neither can my brothers. If anything happened the dog would have to be rehomed or returned to the breeder if he’d take it. This whole thing is a mess and I’m so torn.
My Dad has always had dogs. His favorite was an Australian Shepherd who he adored and took everywhere until she died of cancer when she was 6 or 7 years old. His other dog, who was very old, passed away a few months ago while he was in the hospital and I was going to his house to care for her. Now he is without a pet and looking to get a Queensland Heeler. The issue is this; he now lives alone and is currently going through chemotherapy. He's very week and barely able to take care of himself. He is also a bit of a hoarder so his home is cluttered with "stuff" making it a miserable place to live but he refuses to part with most of the things. It’s not a good living situation for him as it is.
He’s been talking about wanting to get a dog because he’s alone at his house and needs the companionship. He’s been excited about it since he started talking about it a few weeks ago which is a nice change of pace because he’s been feeling very down and defeated. I think he’s right from that aspect; a dog would be good company and lift his spirits. Dogs are great and they do help people get through bad things. The part I worry about is how well will the dog be cared for? If he gets a puppy he has to go through all the training, shots, neutering etc. It’s far too much work for him and the puppy would pay the price. He agreed he would take a one or two year old (still worried about how it would be cared for but not as much as a puppy) but he hasn’t found any adults available so he’s looking at puppies.
He’s meeting up with a breeder today who is bringing him an 8 week old female to look at. This is an awful idea. He knows it is but he’s eager to have a dog and he’s being stubborn and a bit selfish. He asked me about how often Finn has to go out when he was little so I told him about all the work of raising Finn and he said “I don’t suppose there’s anyone I could leave it with for a while” hinting that he wants me to raise it and that’s not possible.
I don’t know what to do. I want what will help my Dad but I don’t want an animal to be put in an unfit home. If he goes into the hospital again or rehab, I can’t take his dog and neither can my brothers. If anything happened the dog would have to be rehomed or returned to the breeder if he’d take it. This whole thing is a mess and I’m so torn.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Jane Christensen on
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Yes, that would make sense!!! Unfortunatly some people don't care!
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Permalink Reply by Alice on
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I thought I'd take a moment to give an update on my Dad and his puppy Molly. She’s going on 4 months old and is quite a bit bigger with nonstop energy and excitement. What started off as a sweet puppy that would sleep in his bed has turned into a little gremlin that jumps, chews and scratches (even while he’s trying to sleep). Needless to say sleeping arrangements have changed and unfortunately she spends the majority of her time in the back yard because he can’t keep her calm and she has been scratching him up pretty badly. His skin is now paper thin and his hands and arms get torn up by her and take a very long time to heal. The doctor told him if he gets any kind of infection, even from a small cut it will likely kill him. This is not a good situation and he admits now that it was a bad idea. He loves her however and thinks if he sticks with it she will grow out of her rowdy puppy stage and be a good companion. The problem with just waiting is that nothing is happening in the meantime. She doesn’t get to go out and meet other people and dogs which may turn her into a fearful or aggressive adult. At this age it’s important that she experience new things but he just can’t handle her. She hasn’t even been back to the vet for more shots since the round he got her when he first brought her home. I visited her yesterday and she jumped and jumped and tried to grab a lot with her front paws. She even left me with a couple scratches. She also peed when she first saw me due to nervousness. She’s a good dog, she’s just not in an ideal situation. My oldest brother who wants another dog (not a Heeler however) said he would take her but my Dad has not agreed to give her up. I just hope if he is going to decide she’s too much for him and give her to my brother he does it soon while my brother can still get her the socialization she needs.
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Permalink Reply by Bev Levy on
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That is a shame Alice. I hope you can have more influence over the situation.
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That is a shame and I agree with Bev. Could your brother take him and start all those important socializations with the dog but then would he live close enough or with your help maybe let the dog visit your dad 2-3 days a week for a few hours? This seems like it would be a win win for both dog and dad! Good luck...I know it's hard!
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Permalink Reply by Beth on
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I'm sorry it turned out that way and your worst fears were realized. It's a shame; had he dealt with a better breeder, the breeder might very well have been able to talk him into an older puppy who was already started, or a quieter adult, and then he could have had the friend and companion he was looking for. As it stands, it sounds that no one is happy with the current situation.
Hopefully he'll let your brother take her.
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Permalink Reply by Jessica on
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I'm sorry to hear that things turned out the way that they did... I've been following the thread and when you posted an update I thought it might be good news. Hopefully your dad realizes that maybe the dog should live with your brother in the dogs best interest. I always hate to see dogs thrust outside. :-/
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I hope he will let my brother take her. I will do my best to convince him it is the right decision. My brother has an older lab and he has a 2 year old daughter so if he is going to take Molly he needs to get her soon. he cannot risk having her not learn to be around kids or other dogs. I think it's great that he's willing to take her in the first place since what he wants is another lab and a Heeler is nowhere close.
My brother lives a good 45 minutes away from my dad so I don't know how often my dad would get to see her. I'm sure he could at least visit with her on weekends. I don't know if he would agree to that. The whole reason for getting a dog was to have company and if he gives her away he's back where he started.
They have a doggy bootcamp out here where you leave your dog for training for a couple weeks. he could do something like that but I'm sure it's very expensive. I'll have to look into it.
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I added a comment after Beth's and somehow it disappeared???
Anyway, I know, it is sad. It started off well and though I was against him getting a puppy I thought it may work out after all but as she grows and he gets weaker still, I can't see it working out for either of them. he had talked about taking her to training classes but if he cannot even take her in for more shots, I don't see training being an option. I got him a book on Heelers and as he reads it he says he may not have been prepared for a puppy. He said if he could do it over he would not have gotten a puppy and possibly would have gotten another breed. I think he just had his heart set on that breed for so long and was desperate for the companionship that he didn't really think it through. I do hope he decides to give her to my brother. he had to have one of his Labs put to sleep a year ago and still has an older female Lab. Ideally he would like another Lab but I'm glad he's willing to take her instead. We both agree though that it would need to happen soon so he can get her trained and socialized since with a 2 year old daughter and an older dog, the puppy will need to be taught some manners. I really wish he would have listened and got an older dog. Giving Molly to my brother will fix the current situation but it will leave him without a companion once again.
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So my brother says he no longer wants Molly. She's too much for him to handle and she's too wild to have around his daughter. This is a problem. I know my dad won't put her in a shelter so unless he decides he's ok with finding her a new home, she will stay with him which is not good at all. He has already had 3 warnings from the city due to her barking. I have not been able to get over there as much the last couple weeks and this week he fell, in his underwear, outside on the concrete. He couldn't get up and the door was open and when Molly tried to go over him to run off he grabbed her and was stuck laying there with the dog in one had and his chemo bag in the other until he was able to get himself up a while later. Stuff like this breaks my heart and I don't know what to do.
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Permalink Reply by Shepdog on
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Man... this just makes me so sad. I know you really tried your best to not have this situation turn this way, Alice, and it's so hard when a family member has it set in their minds and wants to make those decisions for themselves and you know they're likely bad ones. I've had an elderly family member like this, and the dog was the one who suffered most in the end. As a dog lover and a daughter you have to find it just frustrating.
Honestly? If it was me, as much as I love my family, I admit, I'd be pointing out that this dog needs to go into a breed rescue group to give her the best chance. If she continues the barking, your dad will get fined, the dog will be likely taken anyway, and then he (and you by proxy) won't have any decisions to where she goes whatsoever and her chances of being adoped by a family who may or may not suit her needs is far greater. She needs to get into a home that is prepared for her, and her best, best chance is to give her the opportunity now, not when she's even older.
Heelers are tough, reactive dogs. They are high drive, high energy. My friend has one, he's a great dog, but he is her only dog, he goes everywhere with her, and she knows that he has little quirks and is over-protective, head shy, and will bite if a stranger grabs him. She got him as a rescue at six months after he bit the child in the household he lived at. (Deserved, the kids were terrorists, wow. They tied him into a chair and were running around him screaming and poking him. The parent dumped him on someone else quickly, instead of disciplining her children in the first place, but at least he ended up with the right owner.) That dog runs five miles a day at the farm, and can get out of any fence you put him into, and she has had to take serious measures to keep him safe from the situations that could really hurt him.
Personally, that's way too much dog for me! Shepherds and Corgis are a cakewalk compared to the ACD's/Heelers I've met!
She's not the appropriate pet for him (I know you totally know this, too) and leaving her longer in the situation isn't going to make her one, based on what he can and cannot do at this point in his life. :/ Honestly, what if he had never been able to get himself up that day? :(
*sigh* I so feel for you. But the dog needs a good chance at a good life. Unfortunately, she can't step up, so someone has to step up fully and take responsibilty for her. It would be great if you could convince your dad of this; his heart is in the right place, but his life just isn't, and I'm sure he knows that it's totally the case. He may be utterly happy if someone else deals with it for him. Unfair, but ... at least on one good note, I don't think he'll make the mistake again of a puppy and this breed.
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I know she needs a new home and while she's still young. I'll do my best to get him to see this. They're not good for eachother. Maybe he could have a smaller, older dog as a companion instead. He knows it was a mistake to get her. He admits it now but since he made the mistake he wants to follow through, plus I'm sure he loves her. It's a tough situation but he doesn't need the extra stress and health risk. I know she lifted his spirit at first but now I think the stress is outweighing the rest.
I thought the same thing, what if he couldn't get up? It was 11pm and there wasn't a phone in reach and he was bleeding. Thank God he got up but the whole thing scares me to death and trying to wrestle a puppy to keep her from running away just made it worse. I'm scared enough for him as it is; I think the puppy needs to go. I do worry about how giving her up would make him feel though. When he decided to get her he said it was because he didn't want to live his life like he was dying. Not only would she be his companion but also a symbol of hope. I don't want him to feel defeated and give up just because he couldn't handle raising this puppy.
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Hi Alice,
I have to agree that I think you should find her a rescue now where she can get the help she needs to become a productive dog. I know it's hard but your dad could end up getting hurt also. My thoughts are with you as I know this is an impossible situation no matter what you do. Maybe you brothers can help tell your dad the dog must go for his health also!
Good Luck!
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