I think my corgi hates me...
So, Chester is my first corgi and pet. Before getting him, I read different websites, books, etc. on how to properly train and raise a puppy. Unfortunately, I thought I was doing the right thing, and disciplined him a lot because of the recommendation from our trainer. I thought I was developing a relationship w/ him, but I guess I was wrong. Don't get me wrong, he is a really good dog; however, I feel that me coming home after work everyday doesn't excite him so much.
He will run up to the door, and greet me w/ a stretch, and since most corgi's don't have tails, I always look to see if his tail wags, but it never does. When I have guests over, he seems to be happy, his tail is just is like on rapid fire. LOL. and he just seems to be completely differerent. For example, when one of my good friends stayed over, CHester was GLUED to him. He wouldn't really listen to me, unless I had food in my hand. Its like CHester only knew him for a few days, but it felt like he was treating him as his owner. I know that he played w/ him a lot though.
Now, whenever I call Chester, he will come up to me and sit w/ his back towards me. He doesn't run or get excited, its just a slow walk.
Did I do something wrong? How can I establish a relationship w/ him. It will be about 1 year and a few months since I got him when he was only 8 weeks old.
Please advise.
Thanks.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Bev Levy on
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You probably did nothing wrong, he is just used to you being there. However, you can play fun games with him such as fetch and teaching tricks for treats such as shake. Also regular walking also helps with the bonding process. I also like to give mine mini-massages once in a while and they love that. It is possible that you were so intent on having a well trained dog that you forgot to enjoy him. He will be happy to change the relationship. That is one of the great things about dogs!
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Permalink Reply by Chester on
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I actually did spend a lot of his puppyhood being the disciplinarian that I did not play so much. Like I try games with him but it's still the same when we go home.
When I call him over he'll come but he will sit with his back towards me. Why?
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Permalink Reply by Beth on
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Read up on some positive reinforcement training methods if you're concerned. However, the greeting thing--- my male is a very confident, outgoing dog and when we came home he would either yawn or maybe get a toy. Now we have two and the female is an excitable tail-wagger, so she comes running when we come in and brings Jack with her. Still, he wants us to play, not fuss over him.
But when it was just Jack, half the time he wouldn't get off the couch to greet us. Strangers are different and another matter altogether; he'll turn himself inside out saying hello. We worked on not making a big deal out of homecomings when he was a puppy, and as a result he really never seemed to care if we come or go. However when we are home he wants to be near us. They are all different.
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Permalink Reply by Stanley & Charlotte on
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I agree with what Bev is saying. I would introduce more fun activities for the two of you to do. Lots of fetch, training some fun tricks, maybe even some group activities like flyball or agility. I think that would strengthen the bond.
Stanley's always super excited when he sees strangers. He's used to me being around but I know he loves me. He'll often sit with his back turned to me but there are times when he's snugglier and acts like my little lap dog.
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Chester will sometimes just go on my lap too. But what's up with him sitting with his back towards me all the time when I call him over?
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Not sure. Stanley does this often and my boyfriend and I just laugh about it. We're like "oh giving us the cold shoulder, I see how it is!" LOL. I wouldn't take it personally.
I see that you said he often greets you with a stretch. I was reading a book about canine body language recently and the author referred to the greeting stretch (front paws outstretched, head looking up, rear in the air) as the "I love you" stretch. She said it correlated with the dog feeling comfortable with someone and he is saying "I love you!" Now obviously that's probably some exaggeration, but everytime I see Stanley do this I say "I love you too!"
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Permalink Reply by Amanda & Winnie on
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Winnie basically does the same thing with me, though not to the same degree. She always acts so excited to see everyone else but me. She gets so excited that she pees in the floor when my husband comes home (or anyone comes over to the house), but never does that when I come back. She also has a lot more "attitude" towards me than anyone else, but I'm also the one that puts her in her cage, tells her to get off the sofa, not to get into the trash can, pulls unwanted items out of her mouth, clips her nails, and etc. I play a lot with her though, which is probably the reason that she has anything to do with me at all. I know how you feel though, you care for something and hope to be the one that they love the most, but you end up being the one they act indifferent about.
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Permalink Reply by Natalie, Lance &Tucker on
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Dont worry, give Chester time. My hubby was worried that our corgi, when little, didnt like being petted for long periods of time. He is now four and will sit for a period of time to be petted, but before wouldnt. I also remembering sitting on one couch and Lance sitting on another and I would look at him and he would look away from me, purposely!!!! He made me wonder what did I do wrong, lol. He did that for a while, but he did out grow it. Just keep playing with Chester and having a great time with him your bond will keep growing more and more. Walking is great for bonding time too. How does Chester react if you were to bring a new toy home for him?
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Permalink Reply by Sam Tsang on
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Don't get jealous :) Seriously, in order for a dog to sleep on their back when you're around, there needs to be a strong trust. The back is a weak spot, that's why dogs tend to sleep against something "solid" like a wall, couch... for protection.
Continue to train him, challenge him mentally and physically, faithfully walk him a good distance everyday, it builds relationship and reinforce the pack order.
The whole glueing to guests, showing more affectionate thing is just temporary, its just like human kids in real life, they get excited when guests visits, it will wear off :)
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Permalink Reply by Little Bear on
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I absolutely agree with this answer. Especially the part about how kids love it when guests are over. I can't get Bear to stop bringing his slobbery icky ball for people to throw! :D And he's almost 3! I love it that he loves our friends. And they love him back.
I'd also like to add that the walks are essential because its MAJOR bonding time. And you get to assert yourself as a pack leader but he "migrates" *with* you, and its something you do to bring out the trust and love he has with his doggy mommy.
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Permalink Reply by John Wolff on
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What if Chester knows you're gonna have a bit of bacon in your hand when you come in the door? and then throw the tennis ball a few times? and then feed him? and then take him for a walk? with a ball for the playground?
I must say, coming home is one of the best things for me. Al is on sentry duty at the window. Even if I sneak past his guard, at the first tinkle of my keys, they're both jumping and pawing and barking at the door, no restraint. I'm sure the neighbors can hear them. I get mauled (fortunately, they've learned not to do this to anybody else; it may be unwise to allow this). I play up to my role, and act as excited as they do. Then I throw some toys. Then food. Then walk.
Am I their god or their slave? Either way, it's bad for my ego problem.
Reading what Beth wrote, I'm not sure Gwynnie did this before we got Al. Now perhaps there's competition for attention, group dynamics.
Re. discipline, I've heard it said that these dogs respond best to positive reinforcement, not negative disciplining. Keep it fun, fun, fun. Someone wrote something yesterday that alerted me: I've been issuing some commands in an imperious, peremptory tone of voice, when an enticing, invitational tone might do. "Wow! Have I got a treat for aYOU! Come and get it!!" as opposed to, "Come. Or else!" Remember the parable of the North Wind and the Sun, vying to see who could make a man remove his coat.
Be a kid with your dog. I think it's that childlike, playful person in us who they like best. Maybe what I like best, too: compleat license to be a compleat fool.
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Permalink Reply by Geri & Sidney on
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These folks give some great advice. I think between you making things more fun and Chester continuing to mature, you two will strengthen your bond and be lifelong buds.
Could the fact that he puts his back to you a result of his training? Some trainers teach that whenever the dog comes to you, they sit at your side facing the same direction you are. Could it be he picked that up from his training? Or could he be expecting you to clip his leash on for a walk? Or wanting you to pet him on his head and back?
We tend to read the dogs body language as if they had human motivation, as if he was mad or ignoring us. Maybe instead he's trying to tell you something :)
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