Puppy home for several days and looking for encouraging words!
Bella arrived on Friday evening and everyone was so excited, however, I will preface the next paragraph (or ten) by saying no judgement please and just need sage words and/or advice.
Were I to do this again (getting another dog, of any kind) I would not get one from so far away. A few things that have me miffed about the breeder first of all...is lack of communication. I had questions that were not answered and when they were I think they were done so in a snippy fashion. Although through e-mail things like this can be misunderstood. I had the dog flown to me across country. Was charged $45 bucks for the crate and $50 for a "health certificate". The dog did not come with second shots and the ones that were given were given by breeder. Puppy was "never to a vet" other than for the "health certificate". I was also told the dog weighed 5 lbs, and with the crate, the shipping weight would be aprox 20 lbs.
Well Bella gets here and everyone is happy. Sadly I note the $45 dollar crate was old and used. (rusty hardware, nicks, scuffed up.) The $50 bucks for the health certificate was merely a paper stating the dog was healthy enough to fly on a plane along with a signature from the vet. A quick trip to the scale with myself and dog quickly determined what I already knew without even weighing her...she was certainly not 5 lbs! She was more like 12! Supposedly she is 13 weeks, if that is even true. The first evening we also noted red eyes and discharge. Next morning they were less red but some green discharge. *sigh* Used common sense and have been wiping with saline...all is well now. What upsets me the most is I contacted the breeder with my concerns...even sent pics of the puppy at home...and no response. Email was sent out Saturday. We are now at Tuesday. I'm just hoping at this point that we actually get her "papers". Obviously despite all this...we are moving on. Money paid...water under the bridge.
Now we are trying to get through routines. The pup was living in a kennel, so came with absolutely no knowledge of house training and has probably never even been in a house. Bella also came from a different time zone. 3 hours doesn't seem like much, but it is. :) I also haven't seen my cats in days. LOL They have completely vacated the area for the exception of a couple mad dashes to the litter box and food bowl. :(
I'm just going to come out and say it. I'm frazzled. I'm stressed. I'm feeling the "buyers remorse". Its terrible but its true. I've read articles online and talked to many family and friends and they say it will get better. Everyone goes through it. I'm just far from feeling like "It will be okay!" I can say that today has been better than the last 4...but then the "accidents" start occurring again. haha I just feel like one step forward and then another one back.
Despite my own Post-Puppum-Depression....dog is/seems healthy. Family is happy. I need to move on, just having trouble.
Can anyone sympathize? Have you been here yourself? :/
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Linda on
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Wind Dial state that he knew OF the breeder tho has never met her in person, that she has bred champions and has a good reputation so we know she isn't a puppy mill or a backyard breeder. Beth is right that with a holiday weekend emails could have not been checked yet. Amanda is upset, we don't need to be telling her what she should and shouldn't have done. She is asking for help so let's just help.
There is good info on potty training and we all know we need lots of patience with that. We wouldn't expect a human baby to potty train in a couple of days, we can't expect such a young puppy to do so either. Bella has had a huge disruption in her life...a plane trip and if that's scary for us humans just think what it's like for a little puppy. She has been taken away from her mother and her siblings. She needs time to adjust and just like people...some make take a little bit longer than others.
A good check up by her own vet will help put aside fears and with love and patience they will have a lovg happy time together.
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Permalink Reply by Beth on
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Linda, you are right and I sort of came on a little too harsh. I just wanted to make sure it didn't turn into breeder-bashing; some of the things are open to interpretation, and some of the things Amanda is concerned about seem to be more a case of a buyer taking a different meaning away than perhaps what the breeder intended.
It's easy to second-guess ourselves. It took me AGES to get Jack's papers, and I was convinced I'd somehow missed a warning and something wasn't right. It turns out that the sire was from overseas, a wrong number was put in a wrong place on the paperwork and it all had to go back and do the rounds between both the sire's and dam's owners (and since there were co-owns--- and honestly since the breeders weren't panicked because it would be some time before the pups were shown, perhaps they didn't exactly make it the highest priority to get it fixed, that took some time).
Anyway, point is that everything was fine and it was just me not trusting myself to navigate the world of purebred dogs. Jack was fine, I was fine, his sister won a specialty and now her kids are doing well in the ring, and it was just me having puppy-buyer jitters.
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Permalink Reply by Sarah Schantz on
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You know this kind of reminds me of the feeling of overwhelmosis when you have your first child and it seems as though there is a decision to make every minute. I would relax after going to playgroup having chatted with other moms going through the same stuff. This community is like that with such great support and sharing of knowledge. Your puppy is beautiful and hopefully you will fall in love with her. Cherish the puppy times as they are brief, take lots of photos, don't worry too much about the pee and poops on the floor as this too shall pass. My cats have had a hard time and one has chosen to live upstairs - both food, water and litter have moved upstairs and the one that I always thought was more scared is intrigued enough with Phoebe that they are having some contact and I have great hopes for their relationship - it has been 4 months now since she joined the family. It feels as though things revolve around Phoebe but not quite as much as they did initially with having to take her out so often. She has brought so much joy and that is what makes it all worth the work and patience. Wandering through the woods with her is heaven!
So let's see some photos of Bella!!!
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Permalink Reply by Carol & Emma Phillips on
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Hi Amanda - We have a new puppy too that needed to be housebroke. We kept her confined to the kitchen area and in her crate when unsupervised. We took her outside after each activity, sleep, eating, play, etc. We kept a timeline of when she peed and pooed. We also fed her at the same times each day. After several days we were able to establish what her routine was and before we knew it there were no more accidents. That's because we could anticipate at what times she needed to go outside. Now at 7 months Emma rings a bell to let us know she needs to go outside. It takes time, but not as long as you may think. Hang in there. She will be worth it. Good luck!
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Permalink Reply by Jane on
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Most of these concerns really seem like pretty standard practices to me, and no 13 week old puppy is going to be housebroken in a brand new environment. The breeder seems to be a very involved show breeder and she has tons of dogs with registered health tests on offa.org, so I highly doubt this is the type of person that has a kennel full of dogs in the backyard being pumped for puppies. I'm sorry you're feeling frustrated, but I really don't think ragging on the breeder is really justified...
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Permalink Reply by Becky Focht on
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Amanda - my fur baby is 5 months old and I can assure you things do get better. I remember being exhausted with all the work she was at first and then one day I said to my boyfriend, it seems like we are having more good days then bad now. It was like everything just clicked with her, and us, and our routines. It did take time, and there are days when she's a pest but I keep reminding myself she's still a baby. I can honestly say I don't know what I'd do without her, I love her to death. Hang in there things will get easier.
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Permalink Reply by Nina & Nellie on
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When I emailed with different breeders in my area, they were all fairly "snippy" and seemed very short and to the point. In fact, the kindest breeders I emailed were ones who I later suspected were puppy mills or BYB. If they're involved breeders and dog show-ers, most likely they don't have a lot of time and might seem a bit short. I'm not saying all of them are one or the other, but I definitely had the same suspicions as you did when the breeders didn't seem cooperative.
My puppy didn't have their second shots either at 10 weeks. She got them at 11 when I took her myself to the vet. She weighed 7 lbs then but was small compared to her litter, so it's possible you either have a bigger pup or that's about normal for 13 weeks (@ 1-2lb+ per week). I can't say anything for the breeder not taking her to a vet.. my breeder WAS a vet so it was obvious she was doing it all herself, and had good knowledge of what she was doing.
Hope you get your papers soon though. If they're an AKC breeder perhaps you could go through the AKC to demand their papers if they're not forthcoming.
Pups not being housetrained is totally normal. There aren't many breeders who will dedicate themselves to housetraining or even collar training their litter, and those who do are AWESOME. Even if the breeder started them off on housetraining, which is probably crate training, they will never be perfect without supervision until about 7 months-1 year, depending on how strict you are and if they have been reliable for about 2 months. They just physically can't hold it. Get a crate and start pronto :)
Anyway, don't worry about her history too much. If she seems healthy and has a good temperament, chances are she'll end up fine. Start her socialization and housetraining now and soon you'll forget all about your breeder troubles. :)
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Permalink Reply by Elizabeth Kate Rosen on
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First of all, can I just say-- what a cutie! She is really beautiful.
I am a new mom to a 14-week old pup (we got him at 8 weeks) and I can tell you the first few days and weeks with a puppy are super stressful, no matter how prepared you think you are.
I've wanted a dog for ages but this is the first time my husband and I have been in a good position to own one. We spent months researching breeds, discussing options, going to shelters, and talking to a couple of breeders. We were lucky enough to find a marvelous lady just a few miles from our house with a new litter, and we got to visit the pups several times-- even helping with vaccines (my husband is a medic) and bathtime. By the time we brought Oscar home we'd probably spent almost as much on supplies as we did for him-- and he was a pretty expensive little guy.
Even with all that preparation, for the first couple weeks I was so stressed out, and so sleep deprived because he'd whine half the night, that I was in tears and wondering if I'd done the right thing in adding such a huge responsibility to our formerly peaceful, quiet life together. I was paranoid about everything, and I approached every little decision like it was a matter of life or death. Still, I was madly in love with him from day one.
It's only been a few weeks since then but things are already running much more smoothly. He is adjusting to life in our house, and we're adjusting to life with a dog. It's been frustrating at times, but also a ton of fun, and we're looking forward to having some wonderful years together.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is, no matter what circumstances bring a puppy into your life, there will be frustration, but hang in there! It gets so much better, and it's absolutely worth the effort. Also, this website has been a phenomenal source of information, advice, and of course, cute pictures of other corgis. Best of luck!
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Permalink Reply by Amanda on
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Things will get there. I'm still @ a hair-raising place...but I hold out hope. Thank you to all for encouraging words, I appreciate it.
I also want to make it absolutely clear that I am not "breeder bashing" in any way. I think most of the problem was getting a puppy from so far away. There was communication via phone and e-mail and I can see how things can be overlooked or misunderstood. It is not that I got her from a bad person or a horrible kennel. With that said I WAS told she was "kennel kept" after asking about the dogs routine. I also was told "the shipping weight will be about 20 lbs, with puppy weighing 5 lbs.". That is a fact. The crate was old and rusty...fact. $50 bucks for that was not reasonable, in my opinion, and that is just the way I feel. I'm being brutally honest.
Either way...things are as they are. I'm certainly not going to give up and re-home a puppy because I'm stressed. This too shall pass as my mother and grandmother always say. It is a big responsibility and that makes the prospect all the harder. Now obviously I knew this before purchasing her but sometimes things don't "hit home" until you are actually in the thick of it.
I just need the people in my life who know me and love me to tell me 'everything will be okay' 5,000 times. I also need the honest truth and opinion from people like you on this forum who have all been there. With this, I am sure I will divide and conquer!! :)
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Permalink Reply by Tracy & Sir Bentley on
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Hello there Amanda, sorry to hear you are feeling frazzled. As far as the housetraining, do not feel too badly. It took a long time for my Bentley to finally realize that he is to do his business outside. One of the things I did was remove the rug that he kept soiling. This seemed to have helped some. I have been lucky enough to have caught Bentley in the act and firmly said, "No!-No!-No!" and took him outside and waited until he finished his business, then praised him. When he was 9 months old he did not have any accidents. Then when he was 10 months old, for some unknown reason he started having accidents again. This lasted about 1 week. Bentley is now 1 years old. So far, so good.
By the way, Bentley came from a very good breeder. The breeder told me that each one of her litters is different when it comes to housebreaking. Some catch on quickly, others not so quickly.
Just be patient and I'm sure all will be okay.
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Permalink Reply by Momo Taro Lundgren & Mommy pk on
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SOOoo sad that you had to go through all that for your puppy. Poor puppy must also be super stressed out.
I too have bought my Momo, from a distant breeder, that i did not MEET face to face. MOMO, is my first dog EVER. So I want to make sure i got all the info i could on momo, his parents, what she did with him, ect. Though she didn't communicate with me AS MUCH as i would have liked her to, she did respond back to all my questions, WHICH after first couple of emails, I have figured out that she would take a while to get back, i'd ask my questions IN LARGE BUNCHES. LOL....
Momo came to me at about 10-11 weeks. And truly it's the first few weeks to a month of living with you and your family, of the puppies adjusting that will be a "pain" per se. He did have plenty of accidents upon arrive within the first week, and i say it's due to the stress of flying, lack of food on flight (even tho his food was TAPED to the crate, they didn't FEED it to him), and meeting new people.
tho, Momo was raised indoor, free feeding, and was taught the open door is to go OUTSIDE, he wasn't necessarily potty trained, by the breeder. It's only been about 2 months now, that Momo has been, what i'd like to call it, CONFIDENTLY Potty trained.... not defecating on the carpet. Tho he does... have a potty pad that he KNOWS IS OKAY to potty on, should he NEED to potty and can't hold it in, while my husband and i are at work.He's almost 8 months old now. Though, he IS a healthy corgi via my vet and his check up, he's on the smaller size. At 8 months, he's about between 16-18 pounds and everyone said it should be a pound a week until the pups are at 25-27 pounds. It's "cute" i guess, some would say, but i worry if he's too small and i'm not raising him correctly. But due to the fact i didn't have any info on his PARENTS on how they looked like, other than the fact that they were registered AKC So at least, in my mind, i have decided that he is PURE BRED, and other than his size, he is healthy as any other normal corgi, which he is. His smaller size doesn't stop him from leaping bounds and flying over couches (as i have just found out today, that he's quite capable of leaping and flying over the couch to try and get to my husband's office--- that puppy LOVES LOVES to be with my husband, and i'm just the scary meanie MOM, or as i tell myself : i am the pack leader in Momo's life and he does what i say, when i say it, and my husband is his playmate who is always fun to mess with).
It'll take you time to adjust and for her to adjust to you guys. One advice i'd say is make sure she is 'HEALTHY' by your vets, and if she is, then keep her with just the family for now. Maybe meeting TOOOO many people may set her off again. She looks beautiful and just have some patiences.
She may have been an "impulse buy" but you and your family's love for her is not. She is lucky to have such attentive and carrying owners who will do whatever it takes to make sure she is happy and healthy. <3
Praise her when she does well, and discipline her when she misbehaves, and throw in a lot of GOOOOOD AMOUNTS of exercise and she'll grow up to be a beautiful healthy well balanced corgi, who will make you proud. <3
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Permalink Reply by Melissa and Franklin! on
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Unfortunately it sounds like your pup may have come from a puppy mill or backyard breeder. A good breeder will make sure you are good and ready for the puppy before he/she arrives. They will also send along a puppy packages with all her papers and health guarantee. I do have to say, even if the crate was a waste of money, the health certificate is legit. It is required for travel and she was more than likely charged that amount for the little slip of paper signed by the vet.
As for support, I too suffered a bit of buyers remorse....well not remorse per se, but it was SO HARD in the beginning. Franklin came to me crate trained and potty trained to go outside. I lived in a 4th story apartment with no "outside" to speak of. He came to work with me everyday and never had a single accident but had a very hard time learning potty training on concrete. He regressed a lot in the first few weeks but was almost 100% potty trained when going to people's houses who had yards. It was very frustrating to me. I would say the first few months were a big struggle but he is my best friend in the world now and I love him with all my heart. It just takes time, training, and patience.
I'd recommend getting her to a vet ASAP. Get her vaccines started (don't trust the breeders word that she even had them), get her de-wormed and let everyone at the office cuddle and play with her. It will be important to socialize her as much as safely possible now. Also remember there is always this site to help you through it. Your vet can provide you with a lot of good resources as well.
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