Hi everyone. Happy Holidays.
Griffin is our almost 3 year old fluffy Pembroke who is the light of my life! Our family (my wife, son and I) lost our other canine love, K.C. (Labrador mix) a week ago. Her loss has broken our hearts, but Griffin is still with us, thank goodness! In any event, Griffin has always been an independent doggie. We got him at 4 months old from his breeder. He parents are some of the top Corgis in the country on the show circuit, and going back to his great grandparents, his heritage includes 100% champions (just giving you some background).
Ideally, my wife would have liked a 'cuddle dog', which Griffin definitely is not. He is the best baby, as he puts up with a lot, snuggling with 'Mom' a lot, but he has never been truly comfortable with that. Even when K.C. was still with us, it was not unusual for Griffin to spend time by himself in the front room of our home, away from us. You might think that he is/was just trying to get away from undesired 'snuggles', and maybe that's true...but I'll let you tell me what you think. Since K.C. has passed, Griffin has been somewhat sad. We have made a determined effort to pay him a lot of attention (not that he didn't get it before!) He sometimes sleeps in our bed with us, but oftentimes not. But the disconcerting thing is that, unless specifically called by us, and often, not even then, he will go to another part of the house, away from us, and just stay there, sleeping. Again, he has always been independent, but this appears to be even more pronounced now. We are thinking that part of why he USED to be as social with us as he was, was his 'competition' for love from us with K.C. We are hoping that that wasn't the only reason he showed us the love he did.
Does anyone else's Corgi behave like this? Any thoughts, ideas? Thanks in advance for any help you can give us.
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Years ago I had 2 German Shepherds that were 1 year apart in age. They were very bonded. They were not like your Griffin in that they were always by my side and very affectionate However when the older one died, the other shepherd went thru a depression that lasted for a few months. She was very quiet and more to herself. She would go outside and just walk around like she was looking for the other dog. When we would come home after being away a while she would greet us like she was expecting the other dog to return with us and then she would lay down looking sad. Once she got into something in the kitchen which she had never bothered before. We came home to a mess. That was the only time that she destroyed something.
After a few months we noticed a change. She seemed to accept the new arrangement and was herself again.
Because our German Shepherd was quite old at that time we thought adding another dog would be a bad idea. A young pup or adult dog would probably just have driven her crazy. We let her live out her remaining 2 1/2 years as the only dog. Since your Corgi is only 3, you may decide to add another family member when you are ready. Don't rush into it, but keep in mind that the new addition will change the family structure all over again.
Be patient with Griffin. You are ALL grieving. It takes time.
Sorry for your loss.
Lisa
So sorry for your loss. I have several that like to hang out in their kennels as much as by my side and others that are attatched to me.I think just call him and let him do what he choses.I don't believe it was necessarily competition. He is proabaly grieving in his own way too, maybe calling him and pets plus a few extra treats might "help":)
I would give him some time to adjust to being the only dog. I'm sure he is grieving in his own way too.
I agree with the others, when a dog disappears from "the pack" is can be very unsettling for the remaining dog or dogs. They have no way to understand what happened. When I was divorced it took Gromit months to get over losing his wiener dog pal who moved to California. He would go sleep in the same spots she'd sleep in just hoping to find her, I guess. He didn't really get back to being himself until I got Sparkle back in April.
About Griffin, all corgis are unique. Gromit is fine with being petted and loved on but seems just as happy to be off in a corner watching the proceedings. Sparkle is a love bug who loves to be loved on and never gets enough. My first two corgis were some combination of those traits with one being more independent and the other loving to snuggle but not obsessed by it like Sparkle is.
I'm very sorry for your loss. Griffin is going through the grieving process like you are, I am sure. He must not be used to life as a single dog.
I have a Cardigan who is very much as you described. He is not a cuddler, he will tolerate being handled no matter what, but he's not like my other dog, Lady. She LOVES being pet, and even calling her name makes her entire body wiggle with joy. It is simply a character trait. It seems that in shepherding breeds (like our corgis, and in collies/shepherds/etc.) there can be fairly aloof and independent temperaments. Compared to, say, a breed like a Golden Retriever, we have to realise that we can end up with a dog who is pretty happy being a touch removed from where the humans are. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you any less than a glue-pot Golden would. That's just his way of being comfortable and chilling out.
He is probably still grieving as are all of you. I would try working with him a little in either classes or teaching some simple tricks. These activities are very bonding and may help all of you in becoming more accepting of your recent loss. I lost my special corgi (Sparty) this past year and have to often remind myself that Izzy and Misty really can't take his place and should not be expected to. You could use this as an opportunity to bond more with him maybe he is just lonely.
I like this training idea to promote bonding.
Great tip, Bev.
Sorry for the loss of your KC.
I have one Corgi who is a champion cuddler and the other would rather play than be petted, though he does like to keep near us. I wouldn't try to force physical contact on a dog who does not want it. I have found that experimentation pays off; I have a double-weight fleece throw blanket on the couch that Jack (my non-cuddler) loves, so in the winter when I have the throw out, I get blessed with his company on the couch. :-) I honor his preferences by not cuddling, but have found that he adores neck rubs and scalp massages. Who knew? So try different things with Griffin and you may find something he likes.
I agree with others who say he's probably grieving now, though. Let him be alone if he wants. Try some of his favorite activities, be it a game or a walk or some training sessions, to make sure he can continue to bond with you in his own way. He also probably picks up on your sadness and that bothers some dogs. It's ok and it's normal, but it may take him days to months to return to his normal self and adjust to the new dynamic.
You all need some time to heal. Best wishes for the New Year.
I'm so so sorry for your loss and your worries about Griffin as well. I really don't have any advice. I hope you all feel much joy in the new year.
I'm so sorry about your loss. It hasn't been long since we went through the same thing ourselves. My Corgi behaved in a similar way.
Lilliput has never been affectionate, but always very attentive and we do have a good bond (strengthened by agility classes, as Bev has suggested.) At six years old she is beginning to mellow, to sit on my footrest, or on the other side of my bed. On the other hand, my spaniels have always been extremely affectionate, velcro dogs, too much at times. Yes, I find it comforting to have a (big) dog sleep in my lap every night, and with my morning coffee, but I really don't believe this cuddler of mine really care about me more than Lilliput. Our bond is less, but it's the nature of the breed. My corgi prefers her space, my spaniels have never understood the meaning of personal space.
My current spaniel is a relative newcomer, the only dog that came to our home after Lilli. There is competition between these two for my attention, and Lilli does sometimes jump and sit with me to block the spaniel's access. Still, it doesn't change at all the relationship between Lilli and me, just the doggy shenanigans. The times when we are alone are the times that she is more relaxed and acts most like my "best buddy."
When you are ready to add a new dog to your family, keep in mind what your wife wants in a dog. There are dog breeds which are IN GENERAL more cuddly, like your lab. Don't take the corgi temperament personally.
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